Conversations with a Barista
Me: Hi. One Grande Iced Latte with sugar-free vanilla syrup please.
Barista: Do you want it with non-fat milk?
Me: Uhh... sure, why not.
Barista: How about upgrading it to Venti size?
Me: Umm... no thanks. I wouldn't be able to finish. I have heart palpitations whenever I drink that much coffee.
Barista: Ah. Ok... How about some pastry?
Me: No thanks I'm diabetic. Ahh... can I ask you something?
Me: A Venti sized drink has double the shots of espresso compared to a Grande right?
Barista: Well, no. Both sizes comes with 2 shots of espresso. The Venti sized drink will just have more steamed milk and ice so it is in fact more diluted.
Me: Hmm... must be psychological then.
Barista: What's that sir?
Me: The heart palpitations. So anyway, you mean to tell me that you are asking me to pay more for additional steamed milk and ice?
It's amazing how baristas recall the names of their regular costumers. There must be some trick to it. If there is, I want to know since I'm just terrible with names. Sometimes I forget a person's name right after we are introduced. I go regularly to this one branch once a week every Sunday night and after only after about 3 weeks, this one crew was addressing me by name. I came to this conclusion since the alternative seems very unlikely. The alternative being that this particular crewmember for some reason find me so unbearably attractive that she just couldn't help but remember my name and face. Nobody else. Just me. Ridiculous right? Yeah I thought so too.